Clank, whirr! Clank, whirr!
The sweetest sound
When the heat index hits above 85.
As lesser beings swelter
Like mob bosses in cedar saunas,
I slumber in cucumber cool air.
Oh, air conditioner
You give my life meaning.
Well …
Comfort at least.
But air conditioner can be fickle.
A coquette,
Teasing with semi coolness.
Perhaps I’ll work
But I haven’t decided yet.
You bring me to me knees.
I try to do without you.
Perhaps we just need a cooling off period.
Or better yet,
Time to warm our thoughts
About the meaning and importance
Of our relationship.
I try a secondary attachment,
But fans don’t have the same snap.
They waft the air about,
But the vitality
The crispness
That you bring,
It’s not there.
I gaze at you,
Quiet now beneath the window.
I long for your dry demeanor.
But I have to give you enough time
To remember
How much I need you.
You make life bearable, oh a/c.
Please, please come back to me!
A tentative flick, a fiddling with knobs,
You purr and putter
But remain just cool.
Devastated,
I take what you are willing to give,
And sink
Despondent and sweaty
Onto my bed.
In the stillness of the night
Nature calls.
I rise and realize …
Air conditioner!
You’ve come back to me!
I rush to your side,
Bask in your frosty waves.
I want to curl up next to you:
Let your whirring song lull me,
Your chilly breeze wrap around me.
But I know you need your time,
And I need my sleep.
Oh, air conditioner,
You make my life complete.